Anyone who knows me, knows that I have lots of feelings! I've cried at many an episode of The Walking Dead, get very emotional when Nancy does something new and tend to get quite weepy saying goodbye to places and people.
So naturally as Nancy's first birthday approaches I'm getting a bit sentimental. Most people say that time flies by and before you know it she'll be a grumpy teenager. Well, I'm actually on the fence at the moment with this one. Some days I can't believe how quickly she's growing but most days it feels like she's been here forever. I sort of forget what it was like before Nancy was born, I forget what I was like before she was born. Motherhood is a funny thing. So much of it you just cannot describe. The love you feel for the child, the worry you feel when they're sick, the excitement when their first tooth cuts through - it's hard to describe that to someone who hasn't experienced it as a mother.
Now I'm not trying to be a know-it-all, from far it. I don't know what it's like to be a father, an aunt, a woman who wants to be a mother but can't. But I am someone who thought I never wanted to be one and then I was one. Just like that.
Everyday I'm grateful for the events and decisions that led me to where I am today. Nancy has changed me so much. She has taught me so many things, like how to be more patient and less selfish, how to like quiet weekends and early mornings, how to put plans on hold but have fun while waiting. But I'm still learning along with her everyday.
I suppose this year has flown by in ways but it's hard to believe sometimes how different things were just one year ago. And this is just the beginning but one thing's for sure, I'm not taking Nancy on my adventure, she's taking me on hers.